Fear not

Happy 12-21-12

Folks, there is no need to get worked up over the Mayan apocalypse.

I've got this.

Null but not void

I saw my first Null last night. Or, at least I think it was my first. I mean with Nulls, how can you tell if  you've seen one before? Not that you can actually "see" nulls. I guess that's kinda the point.

And in case you were wondering, it got away. Well, I think it got away. It's kinda hard to tell.

Reminder

Mental note: if you break into a thrift store at three a.m. to borrow clothes that aren't covered in blood, someone WILL call the police.

Fear

Are you afraid of the dark?

You should be.

There are some pretty nasty things, hungry things, lurking in the shadows primed for the attack. But there are other things waiting in the darkness, hunting the vile creatures who prey upon the underway.

Things like me.

Country Roads

I’ve always wondered why there are more monsters and icky creepy crawlies in big cities like New York than in tucked away, sparsely populated areas out in the middle of nowhere.

After spending a few weeks off the beaten (and paved) path, I think I have my answer.

People in cities pay no attention to each other. They never make eye contact. They ignore strangers.  Common courtesy, whatever that is, does not exist. The rules are different in tiny mountain towns and hollers and population nineteens across the country. They look. They say hello. They remember. They notice.

It’s easier to be different in a town of millions instead of a town of hundreds. In small towns, people know everyone’s extended family. They know where each other work, where they play, what they do, and where they go to church. Even if your nearest neighbor is miles away, someone always seems to notice you when you leave your house at midnight or do something unconventional in the privacy of your own 100+ acre backyard. 

As counterintuitive as it may seem, you have more privacy in a crowd. In Manhattan or LA, residents deliberately turn a blind eye to the throngs around them. It’s a city survival method. Unfortunately, that is precisely what allows beasties to hide in plain sight.

And one more thing lest you think I forgot – there’s the little matter of supply and demand. If a monster’s food source walks on two legs and carries a social security card, there are so many more to choose from in a crowded city, and their absence is much more likely to go completely unnoticed. Maybe unnaturals dream of ‘getting away from it all’ just like we do – finding a small piece of paradise they can call their own that isn’t patrolled nightly by a famous Angel of Death (yours truly), but food would no longer be abundant and every victim would raise a rallying cry complete with torches and pitchforks. Given that choice, any creature with half a brain (along with extra limbs, spines, webbed feet, a tail, fur, or whatever physiological indicators that they aren’t human) would be smarter to stay in the City.

And it sure makes my job easier to track them down and eliminate them without traipsing all over the mountains and valleys of West Virginia trying to locate one rogue scarnathian.

The bad kind of quiet

There is that moment when a hush falls over the night and even the insects fall silent. That's when you know its about to get interesting.

And by interesting, I mean fun.

Flares

There is something about full moons and solar flares that bring out all the crazies! I think this is going to be a very long day.

Normal

Ever since I was little, I wanted to be two things.

I wanted to be a monster hunter. I wanted to be normal.

Sounds dumb, right?  I mean, there is no such thing as a normal monster hunter, right?

I'd settle for just one part of my life being normal. Being average. So when I found a normal guy, is it any wonder that I was drawn to him?  Some of my friends think that I settled, but they're wrong. I'm happy.  He's happy. Together, we're as close to normal as I'm ever going to get.

Unsettled

I have one of those funny unsettled feelings that something very bad is about to...hold on, someone is knocking on my door. Brb.

when is a paintball not a paintball

I don't believe in love at first sight

But if I did, I would have to thank a tracker dart disguised as a paintball for introducing me to two of the most fabulous human beings on the planet.

Year of Spring

Its the last day in January, and I'm sitting on the fire escape with Narissa. We are sweating from the heat. This is just wrong. Did the apocalypse start but I missed the signs?

Countdown

Some people think I'm a masochist.

Maybe they're right.

My day always begins at midnight. Why should this one be any different? 6 hours and counting...

After night fall

My life starts after most people have gone to bed. I'm not sure if that's lonely or liberating.

silence

I've been an unmotivated girl lately. It's just so hard to juggle a career, a life, and still find time to tilt at windmills...I mean chase monsters. So I've been taking a break from the windmill thing, only to realize that I like it, and it's what I really want to do with my life. Problem is, it doesn't pay the bills. So I sink all of my time and energy doing my "real job" even though teaching spoiled college kids is about as rewarding as - well, gosh, I can't think of anything to compare it to. Yelling in an empty room, maybe. But it's time to buckle down, because I have a CALLING, and it's, well, for lack of a better word, it's calling me. And I hear it, loud and clear.